From where I sat, he was having a good time. I was on the witness stand for hours, cross examined by a defense attorney who seemed to thoroughly enjoy the process of dismantling me piece by piece. Several months later, the case went to trial. We weren’t quite at the stage where people pointed out that rapists were the ones committing the crime. DNA evidence was a few years from being utilized. In 1983, the term “date rape” was not part of the vernacular.
It occurred at a party while I was unconscious from alcohol poisoning. When I was 17, I reported a sexual assault. I became hyper-critical of myself, as if the defense attorney had set up shop in my own mind. I couldn’t have reported it otherwise. But after the trial, my confidence vanished. After the rape, my confidence was still intact.
It was testifying in court that broke me.
If they’re being covered on TV, I leave the room. I’ve had traumatic responses to watching testimony at rape trials in the past. Elizabeth Grey Courtesy of Elizabeth Grey
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